I just came home after an evening out with a great lady. I had a really fun time, and from what I can tell, so did she. It was great except for a couple of minor details.
She didnt talk about her ex'es, but she talked about her current boyfriend. This of course came as no surprise to me as I know that she has a boyfriend, and we went out just as friends. It still takes some of the fun out of it though.

I met her a little less than a year ago when her brother showed up at my doorstep with her at his side. I was so surprised by the pretty girl on my doorstep that I was litterally speechless. A little while later I made contact over IM (lame, but her brother wasnt fortcoming with a phone number), and a month after we met we went on our first date. An incredibly fun evening, and I thought that good things might come of this.

Meanwhile back at the ranch, she had her eyes and heart on someone else, and a month or so later she had a boyfriend which wasnt me. Now, being the fool that I am, I kept cotact and we still saw a movie or had lunch every now and then. Then one fatefull day, they broke up and I thought my moment had arrived. She went with me to a semi formal event, and her lips thanked me for the flowers in her hands. But woe and behold, when I dropped her off afterwards, I got the cheek. During the evening I was also told about how she and a (male) friend did some shopping for a holiday. Someone else was in the picture, and by the looks of it, in the lead.

It was a lead I would close, and a while later they were a couple. I backed off a bit, decided to focus on something else, get a hobby of some sort. I started wondering why I like her. Why do I like her?
Just yesterday I was conviced the she is a lot more trouble than she's worth. Just 6 hours ago, I was sure that spending the evening with friends would be much more entertaining than spending it with her.

Which brings me to tonight. It was like that first night again, down to the R300 hole in my wallet. Except that this time there is sadness instead of hope...

I justify my continued friendship with her with the possibility of meeting her female friends, but in my heart I know that even if I meet them, they will more than likely not be able to compete.

Yes, there are other fish in the sea, but I dont want just any fish
I am not asking for advice, since we all know I will not follow it.

shame... dno't associate me with that chick ya!

jokes aside, you should consider moving on and finding some other chick now... it seems as she doesn't want to go down that hole with you yet and would prefer the friendship route with you... maybe she doesn't want someone she can settle down with atm...

it's easier if you don't communicate with her as much as you would like... try focus of other people other friends!

otherwise NICE story pity it may not end well

Sorry to hear that. If it was meant to be, it would have happened. There will totally be someone better out there for you who will treat you exactly how you deserve to be treated.

From my experience, women are far more attracted to a man that is independent and ok without her than one who's constantly fawning/drooling over her.

Keep your options open and see other women so long. My bet is that if she really does like you and can see that you're a fun, decent bloke by yourself she'll come running.

by now the chick knows that you like her... and she cannot honestly say that she doesnt know that....

however...you cannot just make feelings go away for someone but you can always look around, date other women.... a good lesson i learnt the VERY hard way is that sometimes you becomes so focused, so centered on something or someone... it makes you narrow minded, it closes you off to so many other possibilities, it blinds you... and if you would just broaden your outlook, just a little, take small little steps away from that focus.... you'll experience things that are often ten times greater than what you were so focused on....

Thanks for all the advice. I, being male, am always on the lookout

I have seen her a couple of times since the original post, mostly lunch or so. So she has a birthday coming up next week. Gift ideas... GO!

Something I have thought of, is since she likes esoteric type stuff, a stone (those oryx and quartz and stuff) which goes with her birth date/month. But, just a stone wont do. A necklace or ring (LOL, can just imagine) with a stone will also be inappropriate I think.