Guys, perhaps you should consider printing this out, and giving it to the special woman in your life. SEEING AS THIS IS ALL MOST OF YOU CURRENTLY CARE ABOUT.. They are rules for the women to abide by during World Cup time.

hehe. that is quite amusing. I think it will be sent around the office.

Well so the men think they clever huh.. well here is a female's response to their so called rules....

Extremely important advice and recommendations to be passed
on to husbands, boyfriends, fiancées, fathers, brothers, sons, etc.
(to all men in general) These rules are to be communicated
prior to every menstrual period this year...

LIST OF RULES
1. From before and after the menstrual period, you should be in tune with everything that we say, do and feel. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be branded by all other females as an insensitive uncaring bastard. DO NOT complain about receiving this sort of criticism!

2. During the year, your time is mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of another woman, you will lose it (your eye).

3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during Days or Bold, I don’t mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I wont have time to take you to the doctor or look after you while I have a mood swing.

4. During this time I will see everything, hear everything and be very vocal on everything, unless my mood requires otherwise. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up your dirty washing... it wont happen.

5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces to me to let me know that you are hungry. In return, you will be allowed to watch sports between 12am and 6am, unless they replay an episode of Oprah or Dr Phil that I missed during the day.

6. Please, please, please!! if you see me upset because one of one of the women that is crying and that was cheated on by her husband and are now guests on Dr Phil, DO NOT say “get over it, its only a show”, or “don’t worry, they’ll get back together”. If you say these things, you will only make me angrier and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about relationships than me and your so called “words of encouragement” will only lead to a break up or divorce.

7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch Oprah and you can talk to me during ad breaks, and when you agree with me and only if the topic on Oprah or Dr Phil pleasing me. In addition, please note I am not saying “one” episode, hence do not use the fact that we watched one together to get out of watching all the other episodes.


8. The replays of the Isidingo, Bold, Days, Generations are important. I don’t care if I have seen them or I haven’t seen them, I want to see them again. Many times.

9. Tell your friends to have many babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
I want to go,
I want to go, and
I want to go.
And, if a friend of yours invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we wont be there in a flash.

10. The daily episode trailers on TV every day is just as important as the episodes themselves. Do not even think about saying “but you have already seen this...why don’t you change the channel to something we can all watch??”, the reply will be: “Refer to Rule #2 of this list”.

11. And finally, please save your expressions such as “Thank God your periods only comes once a month”. I am immune to these words, because after this, comes the post menstrual syndrome, you looking at other women, you forgetting our anniversary of the first time we kissed, etc, etc, etc,

12. Thank you for your co-operation.
Regards,
Women of the World

the pms rules remind me of the wife i never had... and never want to have. oi!! as for the world cup rules... no pdf support on phone!

I heard about an implant that women use as contraceptives... It lasts 5 years, and you only have your period once every 9 months?? PMS is a lot worse then, but it sounds like a deal to me!

who feels like putting that pdf file into an html?

As per your request....



LIST OF RULES
1. From 9th June to 9th July 2006, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.

2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remotecontrol, you will lose it (your eye).

3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don’t mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I wont have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.

4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell from the second floor... it wont happen.

5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces to my friends when they come over to watch the games. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.

6. Please, please, please!! if you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT say “get over it, its only a game”, or “don’t worry, they’ll win next time”. If you say these things, you will only make me angrier and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about football than me and your so called “words of encouragement” will only lead to a break up or divorce.

7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the halftime score is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying “one” game, hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to “spend time together”.

8. The replays of the goals are very important. I don’t care if I have seen them or I haven’t seen them, I want to see them again. Many times.

9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
I will not go,
I will not go, and
I will not go.
But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we will be there in a flash.

10. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying “but you have already seen this...why don’t you change the channel to something we can all watch??”, the reply will be: “Refer to Rule #2 of this list”.

11. And finally, please save your expressions such as “Thank God the World Cup is only every 4 years”. I am immune to these words, because after this comes the Champions League, Premier League, Italian League, Spanish League, etc etc.

12. Thank you for your co-operation.

Regards,
Men of the World

wow thanks treshi! what a darling. lol. this list is classic, definately 1 to put up on the living room wall or something! i'm sure this will be forwarded quite a bit. thanks again to treshi for the conversion.