Hey Everybody.

My girl and I were together for 1 year and 5 months.
We were very close.
Lately we'd been fighting a bit more than usual, but nothing to worry me, as we always work it out.

Saturday night, I asked her if she wanted to come to movies with me and a couple of friends.
She said no she has to study, but she doesn't mind if I go.
She really didn't mind.

Got back to her place after the drive-in and ciddled a bit, then she said she felt funny.
She then said she was worried about us.

And then she said she was confused and needed to sort out her feelings and her emotions.

She broke up with me, so i left.

She then ignored me the next day.I tried to phone her but she wouldn't answer.
I SMSed her, and she hardly replied, and then stopped all together.

She won't tell me why she broke it off.

I am deeply in love with her, and I want to work it out with her...

What do I do....

I don't mean to be harsh, but:

"She's just not that in to you"...

Yes it's very hard to move on - because you think there is a future. But IMHO if she can just drop you like that without explanation, then it's over (Yes, you might be thinking that she's doing it to protect herself because she's hurting too - she's probably hurting, but she wants to move on)

Just don't go doing anything stupid, like bugging her relentlessly, and making her life a hell (you know this kind of guy - and he's an ass-clown).

Obviously I'm not 100% clear on how your relationship was, but usually people in the relationship get blinded by "...there's a chance...", and that is a big blockage to moving on...

All the best buddy, it's a hard knock life eh?

Ya its very hurtful.

The thing is, we were so close.
So protective of each other.

I'm just gona wait it out and see what happens...

She has prob cheated on you with someone else...

best to let her be... for a few days then phone her up and ask her what is she thinking and where this is this going, and if you should pack your fishing rods and make for the sea, etc...

btw how old are you? could it be that she's getting pushed into committing into a relentionship that she does not want to be in... guess you'll ahve to give her some space go out party a bit forget about the worries for a few days... then drive over and speak to her face to face...

Her mom was cheated-on, so i can guarantee she did not cheat on me.
But something is fishy...

Good luck going through this (no matter what the outcome is), hundreds of questions must go through your head now... Give it some time to rest and talk to her in person instead of on a phone or sms or whatever...

Let us know how it goes...the worst that can happen is to discover new love.

From my side I think I know where the problem is.

For a period my wife and I fought quite a bit. At the end of the day I found out that the route cause of the problem was that woman are generally FCKED up in the head. Your problem is in your first paragraph. Let me see if I can explain because it took me over 2 years to work this one out.

You say you would always work things out. Thats what I thought too. We would fight and then "sort things out" and I would carry on as if nothing ever happened. Prob is right there chicks seem to hold this stuff in and even though you thought you had "sorted it out" it obviously wasn't 100% sorted in her mind. This is where the strange shit comes in and is pretty difficult to avoid, she will say things are "sorted" out but trust me they maty or may not be and you cant push to see if they are or not as that will only piss her off more. Chicks are weird.

When my wife and I fought I thought we were fighting over the stuff there and then, that is never the case. It's more like you are fighting about stuff then and there and she is fighting about stuff then and there and every little thing that has bothered her EVER and things that are still bothering her that when you asked are we sorted she said "YES" but trust me it's actually a "NO" but you'll never know till it kicks you.

I find the best method usually is NEVER make yourself the Victim always try resolve things taking her side more than yours.

Men will never ever really understand woman, at least I try, and fail

Hope everything works out. Keep SMS'ing her but only a few times a day even if there's no reply just send a "I miss you, i'm sorry" or a "i love you, hope your having a good day" and then forget about the sms!!!! dont stare at your phone waiting for a reply carry on with life. If you stare at your phone you will have the urge to send her another sms!!!!! dont stalk her!!!!!!. I'm sure she will come back. I'll hold thumbs

Good luck man. If she doesn't come back to you my best guess would be that she's cheated or cheating on you. Give it 2 weeks, if it goes over that period without her communicating properly with you.............. then it's prob over.

LOL, that's so true.

You could be arguing about something your friend said when you get home after a movie... but she suddenly says: "Like that time he said XXX", which happened about 3 years ago.

Crazy

Ye, thanks guys!!
Helps a lot!

Well, I do what Warpath described.

But honestly, I don't mean to and I now try my HARDEST to resolve any issues then and there - but like he said - women are weird.

Glad to know I'm not the only one out there that does it.

ANiMOSiTY, give it some time - maybe she needs to work something out in her head, and it's nothing against you?

Good luck.

yeah true true...

although I told my gf to STFU and quit thinking

that's what they do... "oh but you did this... and that was a direct result that cause this and I'm pissed with that and that caused something which I'm not happy about" when all those issues was sorted it's like I have to be a damn record player... THAT WAS SORTED NO MORE ISSUE.

Then she goes on about it where I attempt to defend myself and then she gets pissed about me going on about what she started meanwhile she changed her mind and twisted her story to make it something else... sheesh women gotta slap them or

That sucks. I can remember how it feels to hear those words.

If your gf is the logical type (if there is such a thing as a logical woman), you're screwed. Then she thought this over, and decided to break it off, and will probably stick to her decision.

If she is the more emotional type, then she will probably think about stuff, sort herself out, and maybe even realise what she is throwing away.

All you can basically do is let her know that you want to chat about it, when she is ready. If you keep putting presure on her with too many sms's, she will feel presured and keep running away.

If you send 3 sms's in 3 days, and dont receive a reply to one of them, then its time to stop.

Do you really think so?

She's not replying to SMS's... that's not anything against him? - that's pretty hurtful if you ask me.

Why do the ladies always have to 'sort stuff out'? - I've found that it's usually what they consider a light letdown. Whereas guys find it more hurtful - just come out and say what you have to.

Kill her.

No really...Kill her. Then kill the rest of her brood.

I still have space in your garden everything will work out ok. If you need to hack up the corpse or need a souvenir made drop me a note.

^^ o_0


anwayz.


maybe she's pregnant.

She's logical in a sense, but VERY emotional.

I would have at least thought, that after such a close relationship, she could at least tell me why...

I don't think she's pregnant...
We had a few scares, and she told me when she woried about that...

I'm hurt in a way I never thought possible...

She said to me EVERY DAY "I love you"...
Even the morning of the day of the break-up...

I think if she hasn't contacted me by say saturday or sunday, I'm gona MMS her a pic of us together and see what happens...

EISH

How did she break up?

Got to her house, got all comfy, cuddled a bit.
Then she said she doesn't feel right.
So I said about what??
She said she was worried about 'us'..
And then sort of said she is confused and needs to sort out her feelings and emotions...

So I said, well once you know, let me know..
I'm gona go home then.

i was very nice and everything.

She didn't want me to leave..

I had to tell her Please let me leave.
So i left.

Then she phoned a friend of hers, in absolute tears...

So officially it's not even over...

Why do they do this to us?

Well, there's definately something she's hiding.

In one of the two sms's she sent me on the day, she said its over and she's sorry.
But didnt tell me its over to my face.

I'm sure there won't be another guy at all.
She really is not like that even remotely.
She's religious and just genuine to her morals etc.

Why did she not want me to go?
Whay is she ignoring me?
What is she hiding?

She's the only one who can answer these questions...

To quote George (from Seinfeld) -

"Breaking up is like knocking a vending machine over. You push, it comes back, until it gets enough momentum - and WHAM, it's over"

The first pushes have been made it seems...

I'm sure you've made contact with her friends... I'm sure you could convince one of them to spill the beans?

I have so much I want to say to her...

Reckon I should just wait a bit longer??
Its so hard..

maybe just goto her house and tell her that to spend 1.5 years with someone and not even get an explanation is not the way things should end.

if she wants it to be over, and you love her, you will let it end in a decent way, maybe even continue to be friends or whatever.

If she is not replying, she won't reply, go to her house. that's what i would do.

but i dont mean go to her house and bust a cap or be stalker style, just go there to talk to her. ':D

Ya...
Everybody has told me to give her time...

You reckon, stuff time and just confront her?

Sorry, that was me - forgot to login. Using a different PC...

well i think she owes you an explanation? you spent 1.5years of your time to just be swept away? i dont think that is very fair on you.

I agree...

so go bust some chops and hack her to pieces

no seriously go over /methinks that her friend is giving her the wrong ideas... I know my gf's firned also she keeps tuning my gf to break up with me for no fucking reason at all! (just cos she's single wtf)

ask her to tell it to your face... ask her if it's cos you two are too close and she's not ready for things to come...

The others are right, after that amount of time the least she owes you is an explanation to your face. Then again dude, are you certain you want to be with someone who can just cut you off like that and not even give you a decent reason?

I would demand a reason. Tell her that being female does not give her the right to hide behind her emotions. She is a adult human being and she should fucking act like one.

StanDarsh just made me think..

ANiMOSiTY - how old is she? Perhaps her age can explain this immaturity better? Sounds like she needs to get over herself, imo.

I think you should go to her house - don't sms or phone - that just gives her more opportunity to avoid you.

She is 20 next month.

I think this is what I'm gona do...

SMS her sunday morning.
"Hi. How you doing?"

Hopefully she'll reply.
If she asks how I'm doing I'll say
"I'm ok, but i miss you".

I'll ask if I can phone her..

Try get her to meet me somewhere.

I want to work this out so badly...

Animosity do this

SAT comes:

Drive to her house, ring the door bell, say: "HI, I YOU, WE NEED TO TALK!"

Ya...

I would have already stormed to her house and stayed there till she would talk to me... now u are pulling all ur hopes up at what might never be there. Rather get it over and done with...

I agree with simon. Let her die. See BlackRazor post #1
She dumped you. And unless she has got some magic in her box (and I dont mean pulling a rabbit forth) I suggest we leave it at that...

regardless of whether he wants to get back together, she owes him a god damn explanation. she is not better than him to the point that she can treat him like some little puppy that has been bad and gets no attention until it learns to fetch.

or some similar analogy ':(

Ya I would at least think I am owed an explanation...

After what she done do you honestly expect any sort of respectful explanation? Its going to be one of the old BS :"its not you its you" , "I met god and its not you" or even "Maybe you should see different people and I'll see my new boy with the six pack, loser"

Nevermind...I'm just ranting from experience...back to the soapie.

yeah true she must be hording some toehr six packer in there...

Dude,
Women are way more complex than you or I will ever know.

You say...



But then you also say...



Maybe she's not happy with the way things are in your relationship currently, if you catch my drift?

Chicks do funny stuff like breaking up with you because they don't see any other ways out of their current situation.

The only 'logical' way of changing things, according to her, would be end the relationship?

If you cant patch things up, and you are 100% sure, the least you can do is find out why.

Be a doos about it if you have to. You can always claim emotional distress afterwards. :-/

If you can get her angry, she's more likely to tell the real hurtful truth.

It would anyway be better for you not to be friends for the first 6 months or so. (if you cant patch things up)

Be as irrational as you can be. It brings you to the womans level.

eg.

She:"Its not you, its me"
you:"wtf!?!? What kind of bullsh#t answer is that?"
you:"what about you is it?"
you:"Is it you that are bonking someone else, not me?"


If this way doesnt get the truth out of her, at least it gets you more creative lies. :-p

I sent her an email and now I'm gona just leave it...
If we don't patch it up and get back together, she's lost me because I can't be her friend.

No update means bad news, I assume...?

Oh we can only hope...

stab her in the leg.

<disclaimer> this is not actual advice </disclaimer>

did you kill her and shoot yourself in the head yet? eish

anyhow animosity plz give us some feedback