i will never understand how a person who claims to love you, can look into your eyes, and lie without a twitch, to your face...


how do you get over or deal with being lied to? how?

Hard one.

Depends on the personality of the person. Generally I'm able to just say fuck em and move on with my life. However, some people are not able to do so.

Surrounding yourself with people you know you can trust is generally a good idea. Family comes to mind.

The best way to get over it though, is to promise yourself you'll not fall for that bullshit again, and arming yourself against it in future.

It all comes down to the person who is lying. You can not blame yourself for seeing the best in someone. Especially when it is someone who you believe is true to you and loves you just as much as you love them.

I mean, I think there's 2 types of lying in a relationship:
1. The plain old 'I dont want you to know because i am being a bastard'
2. The decent 'I dont want you to know because i dont want to hurt you'

You have to decide which it is.

Obviously the guy isn't gonna not tell you he is cheating on you because he doesn't want to hurt you. He is beyond caring about you if he is willing to cheat or lie about another woman to you.

This is obviously shit. The person you thought had you in their best interests actually couldn't give a shit.

As ninja_mo said, the best thing to do is to get back with people who actually do care about you, try to move away/forget about the person. which is not easy, but the sooner done the better.

oh, and no matter how much the 'i wont do it again' speech is given, do not accept it. you do not deserve to be treated like that by a person like that.

so yar, there's no easy way of getting over something like this. just remember your values and what you stand for. this should also help you find someone who shares those with you.

Yeah it was huge shock to my system... finding out that everything, right from the beginning was tainted with lies...

But I do feel stronger as each day passes and I feel liberated in many ways... Forgetting is hard.. but its getting better... I am speaking to someone professional as well....and no i'm not ashamed of that... needed some sort of direction as to how to handle the anger and hurt... that helps alot...

That and all the support i've been getting from friends and family and from people on vault9 like toasted, rush and busker... helps alot to have people who care and makes you laugh out loud again.... and i really appreciate it.

There is no easy way.
My Way: Remove the person from your life: Take Cell number, pictures (not the increminating ones where He/she is smoking dope or screwing a woodchuck), Gifts...etc. Put em in a barrel and set fire to it.
Optional Extra: Throw offending person into it after heat has exceeded 300C this will help in cremating any remains and evidence.
Anger/Sorrow: Dont listen to Sinead o connor or any other suicidal musician unless you plan to take a nap in the deep end of the gene pool.
Meditation helps, buying yourself something expensive or just giving into road rage.

You will feel bad for 2 days. Then its back to normal.
Just this time around get a P.I. to check out the person before involving yourself.

And remember we are all here to support you....after copious amount of alcohol and LSD.

black!

I'd say give the bastard a RFS and he can kiss his nads good bye

Blackrazor: I will definitely take ur solutions into consideration.. esp the throwing person into heat exceeding 300C thing.. personally i would use oil or wax that is heated to that temperature...

Anger...good! Release it! Feel the power to whoop ass...

As always I offer advice where none is needed but hey it keeps me out of prison and promotes a healthy social interaction with my virtual friends.