FINE
This is the word women use to end an argument when they feel they are right
and you need to shut up. Never use "fine" to describe how a woman looks -
this will cause you to have one of those arguments.
FIVE MINUTES
This is half an hour. It is equivalent to the five minutes that your
football game is going to last before you take out the trash, so it's an
even trade.
NOTHING
This means "something," and you should be on your toes. "Nothing" is
usually used to describe the feeling a woman has of wanting to turn you
inside out, upside down, and backwards. "Nothing" usually signifies an
argument that will last "Five Minutes" and end with "Fine"
GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows! )
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over
"Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine"
GO AHEAD (Normal Eyebrows)
This means "I give up" or "do what you want because I don't care" You will
get a "Raised Eyebrow Go Ahead" in just a few minutes, followed by
"Nothing" and "Fine" and she will talk to you in about "Five Minutes" when
she cools off.
LOUD SIGH
This is not actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often
misunderstood by men. A "Loud Sigh" means she thinks you are an idiot at
that moment, and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and
arguing with you over "Nothing"
SOFT SIGH
Again, not a word, but a non-verbal statement. "Soft Sighs" mean that she is content. Your best bet is to not move or breathe, and she will stay content.
THAT'S OKAY
This is one of the most dangerous statements that a woman can make to a
man. "That's Okay" means that she wants to think long and hard before
paying you back for whatever it is that you have done. "That's Okay" is
often used with the word "Fine" and in conjunction with a "Raised Eyebrow."
GO AHEAD!
At some point in the near future, you are going to be in some mighty big
trouble.
PLEASE DO
This is not a statement, it is an offer. A woman is giving you the chance
to come up with whatever excuse or reason you have for doing whatever it is
that you have done. You have a fair chance with the truth, so be careful
and you shouldn't get a "That's Okay"
THANKS
A woman is thanking you. Do not! faint. Just say you're welcome.
THANKS A LOT
This is much different from "Thanks." A woman will say, "Thanks A Lot" when
she is really ticked off at you. It signifies that you have offended her in
some callous way, and will be followed by the "Loud Sigh." Be careful not
to ask what is wrong after the "Loud Sigh," as she will only tell you
"Nothing"
Full Version: Words Women Use
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so true
no matter how much I learn that list, I am doomed to fail : (
OOooooo please add more 
So that us dumb males can understand ur complex species.
/ waiting for Anime's Female Dictionary to b 4 sale
So that us dumb males can understand ur complex species.
/ waiting for Anime's Female Dictionary to b 4 sale
Reminds me of a joke:
Digging in his back yard, a guy finds a lamp with a Genie in (you know the drill). He gets a wish.
"I want a highway from my house to Hawaaii" he asks.
"Don't be silly" replies the Genie. "Do you know the work involved in wishing up a concrete structure over hundreds of miles of sea? Come on, isn't there something else?"
The man thinks for a while and responds "ok, I want to understand the female mind".
The Genie immediatly replies "do you want that highway 2 lanes or 4?"
Digging in his back yard, a guy finds a lamp with a Genie in (you know the drill). He gets a wish.
"I want a highway from my house to Hawaaii" he asks.
"Don't be silly" replies the Genie. "Do you know the work involved in wishing up a concrete structure over hundreds of miles of sea? Come on, isn't there something else?"
The man thinks for a while and responds "ok, I want to understand the female mind".
The Genie immediatly replies "do you want that highway 2 lanes or 4?"
ROFLMAO!!! OMG! That is just tooooooo funny. My god, even I'm guilty of "nothing" and "that's okay." Good lord, I'm falling into the stereotype! BTW, you missed one. "Whatever!"
Nuf, I've heard that one before, but I never get sick of seeing it. Its brilliant! Thanks for sharing it. LMAO
Nuf, I've heard that one before, but I never get sick of seeing it. Its brilliant! Thanks for sharing it.
LMAO
ur not the only one that is guilty
i think those exists in womans' dictionary
i think those exists in womans' dictionary
double post :/
damn
damn
words men think woman use
No
Yes
Stop It
No, go ahead
Leave me alone
Stop it, you are irritating me
":D
No
Yes
Stop It
No, go ahead
Leave me alone
Stop it, you are irritating me
":D
Jeez... I'm guilty of all of those.
I used "fine" last night
I used "fine" last night
Anime, funny and astute
However DoctorMoo, I would be careful assuming that NO means Yes.
Friendly woman advice
However DoctorMoo, I would be careful assuming that NO means Yes.
Friendly woman advice
yar yar, i not gonna rape no one ":D
QUOTE
GO AHEAD (With Raised Eyebrows! )
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over
"Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine"
This is a dare. One that will result in a woman getting upset over
"Nothing" and will end with the word "Fine"
My girlfriend bit me on my arm once ... all in a playfull manner ... but she bit me freaken hard!So I was like well now I owe you a bite ... and she was like 'Go ahead'(with raised eyebrows) ... well i never even bit her hard but she wasnt exactly to happy about it.lol
One more to add to that list Anime
OH
This word -- followed by any statement -- is trouble. Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least two days. ("Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead," sometimes followed by acts so unspeakable that I can't bring myself to write about them.
OH
This word -- followed by any statement -- is trouble. Example; "Oh, let me get that". Or, "Oh, I talked to him about what you were doing last night." If she says "Oh" before a statement, run, do not walk, to the nearest exit. She will tell you that she is "Fine" when she is done tossing your clothes out the window, but do not expect her to talk to you for at least two days. ("Oh" as the lead to a sentence usually signifies that you are caught in a lie. Do not try to lie more to get out of it, or you will get a raised eyebrow "Go ahead," sometimes followed by acts so unspeakable that I can't bring myself to write about them.
A bit off toipic but still worth a laugh:
Women think they already know everything . . .
But training courses are now available for women on the following subjects:
Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before
The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits
Parties: Going Without New Outfits
Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too.
Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His
Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First.
Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking
Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging
Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire
Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up
Introduction to Parking
Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space
Water Retention: Fact or Fat
Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter
Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not for Human Consumption
Cooking III: How not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People
Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully
Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have
Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice
Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together
Oil and Petrol: Your Car Needs Both
TV Remotes: For Men Only
Women think they already know everything . . .
But training courses are now available for women on the following subjects:
Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before
The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits
Parties: Going Without New Outfits
Bathroom Etiquette I: Men Need Space in the Bathroom Cabinet Too.
Bathroom Etiquette II: His Razor is His
Communication Skills I: Tears - The Last Resort, not the First.
Communication Skills II: Thinking Before Speaking
Communication Skills III: Getting What you Want Without Nagging
Driving a Car Safely: A Skill You CAN Acquire
Telephone Skills: How to Hang Up
Introduction to Parking
Advanced Parking: Backing Into a Space
Water Retention: Fact or Fat
Cooking I: Bringing Back Bacon, Eggs and Butter
Cooking II: Bran and Tofu are Not for Human Consumption
Cooking III: How not to Inflict Your Diets on Other People
Compliments: Accepting Them Gracefully
Classic Clothing: Wearing Outfits You Already Have
Household Dust: A Harmless Natural Occurrence Only Women Notice
Integrating Your Laundry: Washing It All Together
Oil and Petrol: Your Car Needs Both
TV Remotes: For Men Only
Okay last one:
What men say and what they mean . . .
"I'M GOING FISHING" Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."
"IT'S A GUY THING" Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?" Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?" "UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR
"YES, DEAR..." Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN" Means: "I have no idea how it works."
"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND." Means: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra."
"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD". Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR." Means: "Are you still talking?"
"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS." Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."
"I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES". Means: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
"OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL." Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."
"HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING." Means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."
"I CAN'T FIND IT." Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?" Means: "What did you catch me at?"
"I HEARD YOU." Means: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."
"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE." Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC." Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."
"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE." Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."
"WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK." Means: "I make the messes, she cleans them up."
What men say and what they mean . . .
"I'M GOING FISHING" Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."
"IT'S A GUY THING" Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
"CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?" Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?" "UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR
"YES, DEAR..." Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
"IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN" Means: "I have no idea how it works."
"I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND." Means: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra."
"TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD". Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
"THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR." Means: "Are you still talking?"
"YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS." Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."
"I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES". Means: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
"OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL." Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I'm hurt."
"HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING." Means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."
"I CAN'T FIND IT." Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
"WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?" Means: "What did you catch me at?"
"I HEARD YOU." Means: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."
"YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE." Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
"YOU LOOK TERRIFIC." Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."
"I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE." Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."
"WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK." Means: "I make the messes, she cleans them up."
Good thing you followed with some male remarks. It would have been nice knowing you otherwise
I see. *raises a brow at andyddr* Yeah, that's another one. LOL. BTW, very funny, but it would have been funnier if I were a guy (try and decipher that meta-message). LMAO.
One thing I've also noticed from the many women in my family. How about that feminine, emphatic "please" that's more like a command than a request? "Could you PLEASE take out the trash." My mother has the perfect acerbic tone that would make any male experience shrinkage. Hell, I'm a woman and I want to recoil. LOL. I think its a pre-requisit for those kind of women that refuse to acknowledge the concept of volition. "No? Did you just tell me NO?" God save you from the fate that would follow such a question. The nice thing about being a woman too, and being on the receiving end of such a statement, is that I can tell her to go to hell, which I have. The best thing to do, I'm telling you men this, get away from a woman like that first of all, and then simply not care. Boy, I never knew my mother could go so ballistic as when I just walked away from her during one of her feminine tirades. Talk about venomous harangue! Its enough to cinge the fine hairs in your ear.
One thing I've also noticed from the many women in my family. How about that feminine, emphatic "please" that's more like a command than a request? "Could you PLEASE take out the trash." My mother has the perfect acerbic tone that would make any male experience shrinkage. Hell, I'm a woman and I want to recoil. LOL. I think its a pre-requisit for those kind of women that refuse to acknowledge the concept of volition. "No? Did you just tell me NO?" God save you from the fate that would follow such a question. The nice thing about being a woman too, and being on the receiving end of such a statement, is that I can tell her to go to hell, which I have. The best thing to do, I'm telling you men this, get away from a woman like that first of all, and then simply not care. Boy, I never knew my mother could go so ballistic as when I just walked away from her during one of her feminine tirades. Talk about venomous harangue! Its enough to cinge the fine hairs in your ear.
ROFLMAOWTIME! Andy your relationship must be pretty interesting! Nuf seen that before but those are the wise words! Anime about that dictionary...
*Ravilj quickly jots down some notes*
*Ravilj quickly jots down some notes*
I'll say one thing:
I'd hate (ie pay) to see what Anime and Yana angry with their respective mates, especially if they have had too much to drink
I'd hate (ie pay) to see what Anime and Yana angry with their respective mates, especially if they have had too much to drink
and more...
You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think
about?
This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house.
I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and
wallpaper.....
Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there!
I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep.
Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.
How much do you love me? = I did something today you're really not going to like.
I'll be ready in a minute. = Kick off your shoes and find a good
game on T.V.
Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful.
You have to learn to communicate. = Just agree with me.
Are you listening to me!? = [Too late, you're dead.]
Was that the baby?=Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep.
I'm not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is
important.
You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever think
about?
This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house.
I want new curtains = and carpeting, and furniture, and
wallpaper.....
Hang the picture there = NO, I mean hang it there!
I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep.
Do you love me? = I'm going to ask for something expensive.
How much do you love me? = I did something today you're really not going to like.
I'll be ready in a minute. = Kick off your shoes and find a good
game on T.V.
Is my butt fat? = Tell me I'm beautiful.
You have to learn to communicate. = Just agree with me.
Are you listening to me!? = [Too late, you're dead.]
Was that the baby?=Why don't you get out of bed and walk him until he goes to sleep.
I'm not yelling! = Yes I am yelling because I think this is
important.
Men's English:
----------------------
"I'm hungry." = I'm hungry.
"I'm sleepy." = I'm sleepy.
"I'm tired." = I'm tired.
"Do you want to go to a movie?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
"Can I take you out to dinner?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
"Can I call you sometime?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
"May I have this dance?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with
you.
"Nice dress!" = Nice cleavage!
"You look tense, let me give you a massage." = I want to fondle
you.
"What's wrong?" = I don't see why you are making such a big deal
out of this.
"What's wrong?" = What meaningless self-inflicted psychological
trauma are you going through now?
"What's wrong?" = I guess sex tonight is out of the question.
"I'm bored." = Do you want to have sex?
"I love you." = Let's have sex now.
"I love you, too." = Okay, I said it...we'd better have sex now!
"Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." = I liked it better
before.
"Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." = $50 and it doesn't look that much different!
"Let's talk." = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person
so that you'd like to have sex with me.
"Will you marry me?" = I want to make it illegal for you to have
sex with other guys.
(while shopping) "I like that one better." = Pick any freakin'
dress and let's go home!
----------------------
"I'm hungry." = I'm hungry.
"I'm sleepy." = I'm sleepy.
"I'm tired." = I'm tired.
"Do you want to go to a movie?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
"Can I take you out to dinner?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
"Can I call you sometime?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with you.
"May I have this dance?" = I'd eventually like to have sex with
you.
"Nice dress!" = Nice cleavage!
"You look tense, let me give you a massage." = I want to fondle
you.
"What's wrong?" = I don't see why you are making such a big deal
out of this.
"What's wrong?" = What meaningless self-inflicted psychological
trauma are you going through now?
"What's wrong?" = I guess sex tonight is out of the question.
"I'm bored." = Do you want to have sex?
"I love you." = Let's have sex now.
"I love you, too." = Okay, I said it...we'd better have sex now!
"Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." = I liked it better
before.
"Yes, I like the way you cut your hair." = $50 and it doesn't look that much different!
"Let's talk." = I am trying to impress you by showing that I am a deep person
so that you'd like to have sex with me.
"Will you marry me?" = I want to make it illegal for you to have
sex with other guys.
(while shopping) "I like that one better." = Pick any freakin'
dress and let's go home!
ROFLMAFAO! OMG! Those are just hilarious!!!
Ever notice that regardless of which gender's perspective is taken, men are the one's being bashed? LMAO. I mean, poor guys always look stupid. I do admit, I love the "meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma" bit. I call it PMS.
BTW, doovatis, I love your Orgasmo. I didn't know that was still circulating. Its particularly funny, considering I was an active mormon until three years ago. LOL
As for you, W1D0WM( at )K3R, I don't have to get drunk to be acerbic. I manage just fine with a, "god, you're fat" statement from a guy. LOL
Ever notice that regardless of which gender's perspective is taken, men are the one's being bashed? LMAO. I mean, poor guys always look stupid. I do admit, I love the "meaningless self-inflicted psychological trauma" bit. I call it PMS.
BTW, doovatis, I love your Orgasmo. I didn't know that was still circulating. Its particularly funny, considering I was an active mormon until three years ago. LOL
As for you, W1D0WM( at )K3R, I don't have to get drunk to be acerbic. I manage just fine with a, "god, you're fat" statement from a guy.
LOL
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